a narcoleptic spectrum

forgive me of my continual misunderstandings
my fingers
crimson
for each nickel worth saving.

above my flesh, a thousand pounds push down
squished, i am,
pummeled with the weight
of each life i could choose, while
Dionysius is suffocated
under the lace of his lover.
But boats are falling under
the riptide of casinos-
buzzing and booming
and falling- into dark, dark, dark chambers
bound to their owners,
bound to their captives,
bound to all of our feet.

i used to think, "it is all parallel,"
but no! perpendicular! intersections!
slicing and cutting and searing!
open wounds,
gauze, blood, blood, blood.
all i can see is crimson-
forgive me of my undying misinterpretations;
i am sorry.
i will
scream it-
"my eternity did not begin at my inception!"
i will repeat it
until i comprehend
we were existing before we began!